Kelly approached me last November about emails she was sending and receiving from her brother Bobby from California. Apparently he and his current girlfriend Betty are being asked to leave her mother’s house and they are in need of a place to stay long enough for them to get jobs in the area and save enough money for them to get their own apartment. Kelly has a huge heart and she loves her brother very much, but she was leery because she helped him out before and she had to eventually kick him out. Well she harbored guilt over that last incident so she was seeing this as an opportunity to make things right between them.
I love Kelly more than breathing, so I told her that if she needed this then I would support her decision. She emailed him back and told him that we would help them out but things would have to be different then they were last time. He said that they would be. I had not met her younger brother yet so I was a little nervous about possible personality conflicts. When they arrived early December both Betty and Bobby seemed very quiet and reserved, but they seemed willing to fit into the family mayhem.
We didn’t set out rules for them or a list of chores like we probably should have. We just assumed that they would be more than willing to help out around the house until they were working and could contribute to the household expenses. Well, we assumed wrong. They say they are willing to do anything we ask, but we have to ask every time, and that is such a hassle. Kelly even started feeling like we were taking advantage of them. How could she have gotten the entire thing twisted?
I’m not saying that they didn’t help because they really did. They would watch the kids in the at least one evening on the weekend so I could go out with Kelly. We haven’t really been able to do that much for a long time, and we needed as a couple. Kelly and I haven’t gotten so much closer since they have moved in, but I personally think they could be doing so much more to help out. I also think they should just pick at least one room a day to clean or watch the little ones during the morning so that Kelly can pick up the house and do laundry. I don’t think that would be too much to ask.
I was warned by my boss that this was a bad idea and that it would not end well. I am starting to see his point now. Bobby has recently been hired to be a stockman at Wal-Mart in the middle of the night. I know that sounds good but as soon as he got his first check he received a letter in the mail about paying child support for his son in California. The child support payment leaves him with only 400 dollars a month which is not enough to give us any and save. He for some reason feels that now that he is working any of the simple chores he was doing around the house are no longer his responsibility. Since he works all night he sleeps all day and Betty sleeps all day with him, so she is of no help during the day either.
Kelly is at her wits end, but she doesn’t want to give up on them yet. They are really nice young people but they are lazy and a little self centered. Kelly is now picking up after two extra people and it is wearing on her nerves. It is nice to have help with the kids in case of emergencies but they should also be doing things around the house on their own. I want Betty to get a job and I want Bobby to help out around the house more. I am going to have to confront them about it very soon. I just hope it doesn’t cause any conflict between Kelly and I.
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